An elegant Autumn wedding with a twist of the farm…
This week, I’m so excited to share JTBC bride Rachel’s wedding day story. Rachel married Mike at St Kentigern’s Church, Caldbeck, then onto Three Hills Barn, Torpenhow for their wedding reception. I absolutely adore Rachel’s beautifully elegant and rustic October wedding, with all the shades of Autumn. I also love Rachel’s wedding day storytelling and how descriptive she is about her dress, flowers, and the moments from their big day. If you’re in need of wedding planning advice… Rachel’s wedding planning tips for future brides-to-be are an absolute must-read too! So grab a brew, take a seat, and be inspired by Rachel and Mike’s truly beautiful ‘Cumbrian wedding with a twist of the farm’. It’s such an enjoyable read and their wedding photos are simply stunning.
Tell me about your dress and accessories.
I can’t lie. As I write this, (post-wedding day) I am sitting in my living room in my favourite Ikea yellow armchair and yes, you guessed it, I’m in my wedding dress! How did I feel in my wonderful ‘Autumn’ dress and ‘Heather’ jacket? I felt majestic! It was the ‘Heather’ jacket that sold this dress to me, as I knew I wanted a wedding dress with opaque sleeves and it seemed like it was going to be such a challenge to find. Cue Julia! I accessorised my dress with the ‘Heather’ jacket, and also added pearl stud earrings, and suede burgundy pointed-toe shoes with kitten heels. I teamed these with Mac’s ‘D is for Danger’ lipstick!
Your bridesmaid dresses.
Our bridesmaids wore dresses from Catherine Paige Bridal in burgundy – a colour that we all liked and added an oomph of warmth to what we knew would be an autumnal day. I was desperate for them all to have dresses that they liked – as long as they were the same colour and length. My sister, Amy, chose hers first – a halter neck chiffon gown. Nicola and Kate, coincidentally, both fell in love with a high-neck bateau-shaped bodice with a V-shaped back. We removed the ‘bling’ on the waist but kept it on the shoulders, then a seamstress used one of the spare beaded strips on Amy’s dress to tie the three together. Our god-children wore ivory high-low dresses from Monsoon with ivory satin shoes.
What was the theme of your wedding?
Cumbrian with an essence of classic Audrey Hepburn and a twist of the farm.
Your wedding flowers.
On a weekly shopping trip to the local grocers, my Nan had been talking to a lady who works there. It emerged that she used to be a florist and she offered to do our wedding flowers. We were really trying to keep everything local and so it seemed like common sense. It was wonderful having Alison Nugent as part of the wedding team. Alison and I seem to sing from the same hymn sheet, she understood my vision and was full of ideas and on our side in terms of cost.
Alison agreed to create bouquets, button-holes, church flowers, and flowers for grandparents’ graves. My Nan made the flower arrangement for the altar – a long piece that lay along the ledge beneath the huge stained glass window. It was a range of shades of ivory and green which really accentuated the central stained glass window. My Mum was a trooper and arranged all of the flowers at the venue (after raiding Tesco for roses and growing a plethora of eucalyptus plants at home).
When it came to choosing the scheme I wanted, I struggled. I found this one of the hardest bits about wedding planning and – I must admit – this is where it all became stressful. Maybe it was just timing – who knows? I knew what I liked, I wanted everyone else to be happy and couldn’t see how it was all going to work, as well as being vehemently protective of our day and pushing people away. Cue the bridesmaids and their straight-talking words of wisdom! I’d been ‘pinteresting’ this day for the last 13 years (yes, I am that person) and all it took was for me to flick through old photos to remind myself what I envisioned. It was rustic, less structured, and full of warmth, texture and colour. A little hint of Princess Eugene’s bouquet and flower arrangements but with more burgundy and warmth. And Alison did not disappoint. She doused the pillars of the church with hydrangeas and greenery, tied with hessian bows, and crafted huge arrangements in two milk churns from my parent’s farm which could be moved to the venue afterward. The window sills were lit with candles, scattered with foliage and the church really was ‘alive’. Our bouquets were a mixture of dusty pink/mauve shades with ivory roses and blue thistles, intertwined with dainty greenery, and were just like the photos I had saved.
At the venue, Mum had spent two full days arranging and finessing. She had collected jam jars, candles jars, and even glass dessert containers and tied hessian strings around them. We had an old fallen tree at my parent’s farm which my Dad and brother cut up and we used the wood as centerpieces. We then placed jars holding roses and eucalyptus on the trunk with a little candle. It all looked a little cluttered, so Mum’s creativity came in handy as she gathered slates that had fallen off one of our farm buildings and used these as slabs for the church pillar candles to sit on. Mike’s mum gave us some little wooden decorations for the tables which finished the look. They were also in charge of distributing the jam into pots for the favours – something which wouldn’t have got done if they hadn’t stepped in!
Tell me about your wedding day.
‘Your wedding day. A day which celebrates the pair you are, have been, and are yet to become’... You don’t get many of them – do you? And, we must admit, we had a blast.
Our mornings began with family, me at my parent’s farm in Caldbeck and Mike at our home in Wigton. The morning was the only part of the day that didn’t fly by. Amy and Katrina, friends who were doing hair and make-up, arrived at the farm at 6am and it was such a relaxed time. I was desperate to go and feed tups with my Dad and my brother but Mother wouldn’t let me! It was also the quarter-final of the rugby world cup and England was playing, which had us clinging to the edge of our seats for a few hours of the morning.
After the big ‘dress reveals’ to the bridesmaids and my Dad, the pair of us mounted the tractor. We arrived at the church only to be greeted by some villagers and even students from my school, which was wonderful. And it was from there that the day flew by. I’d set everyone’s homework to rehearse hymns – I hate going to a service where no one puts a bit of wellie into it – but the dog must have eaten the homework sheet. Nevertheless, the whole service was a hoot – with the Vicar, Eileen, stopping people if they didn’t give it a bit of oomph. I have a well-known love for Midsomer Murders and so Dad and I walked down the aisle to ‘The Village’ by Jim Parker. Two of our friends, Josh and Jodie read the reading (Ecclesiastes 4: 9-12 ‘Two are better than one’) and the poem (The Vow by Wendy Cope) as we both really liked the succinctness of these pieces. Mike and I left the church to Elgar’s ‘Pomp and Circumstance’ because… well, why not? It was great seeing everyone bobbing up and down – full of spirit and frivolity!
Mike and I had our photographs taken on the top of Caldbeck Common, with the family farm and our favourite view of Roughton Gill in the background. Thankfully the rain held off for this but, by heck, the wind blew. Mike was rather chilly and concerned about where he was walking, but I was having the time of my life. Sadly, there was no dodging the sheep muck and although Camilla, our photographer, and Mike were great at helping with the dress, it did get a little… colourful. I was in a state of effervescence, though, and to me – it was our day, a great day, and I only got one – so I didn’t give it much thought.
We made our way to Three Hills Barn – a venue that Mike and I had been to look at before we were even seriously thinking of getting married or planning a date (I did tell you I’d been planning this day since I was 15!). It’s situated on a working dairy farm – which suited us to the ground – and is surrounded by nothing but fields – idyllic, right? Farmer Mark greeted everyone – donning his kilt – and ushered them into the newly renovated barn which used to be the old milking byre. Whilst everyone perched on bales of straw wrapped themselves in blankets, and had a ‘bit craic’, as we Cumbrians call it, we began the formal photographs. We didn’t want too many of these as we really wanted to have a documentary-style selection of photos – but thought a few were essential – cue the heaven’s opening! Poor Camilla! As she stood outside donning her mint green anorak, we gathered at the entrance of the barn and began the hokey cokey – step out for the photo, step in to get out of the rain. We had it mastered! Both Mike and I were relieved and so happy this worked out well. In so many weddings we’ve been to the photos have taken over an hour and the bride has just wanted to mingle with people. What I didn’t realise was how much your photographer/videographer keeps you on time from the very start of the day. All hail Camilla and Pete!
We both loved growing up and adore living in Cumbria – so much so it was an integral part of our wedding day. Whether it be arriving on a tractor, sourcing local produce, or using small local businesses. In various places, you could see elements of Cumbria. The timeline of the day was written on wooden pallets – in Cumbrian – as was the blanket sign and ‘welcome’.
We moved to the main barn when the byre had run out of beer – you can tell what motivates our friends, can’t you? After everyone found their tables, which were the names of places on our family farm or Cumbrian sayings, the speeches began. We thought it better to do speeches first as no one likes eating with a stomach ridden with nerves and, let me tell you, the food was epic! Mike enjoyed it so much, he asked for steak pie and Cumberland sausage for his main! I suppose the groom can do what he likes though, can’t he? Anyone who knows me knows that I’m a people watcher, so this part of the wedding was perfect: sat at the top table, observing. I felt like a twitcher! And I missed nothing – an aunt missed the church and sneaked in just as food was being served! I know – the cheek!
Mother had set up a ‘kiddies area’ with our old toy farm and had made little gift bags with puzzles for each child. It was adorable – not something I’d have thought of or done and it went down a treat! We only had a few children to our wedding and it was perfect for them and kept them entertained whilst the adults ate.
We were a little apprehensive that the bridge from dinner to supper was going to be a bit ‘dead’, so I asked an ex-student, Haz King, to play some acoustic songs and it was a perfect interlude. Everyone enjoyed it and it gave us time to circulate and welcome the evening guests.
Mike’s band, Llama Llama, played songs to open the night-do. It was a relief to not do the first dance if I’m honest. Neither of us wanted to do it and my girls were right behind me on the dance floor when the boys started playing. The unexpected can also make the wedding: two of Mike’s friends were the funniest people on the dance floor and had everyone in stitches, Sneaky Finch asked Mike and me to sing the chorus of a song, and we did the conga around the reception venue when the band played The Proclaimer’s 500 miles, and the ice-cream cart was a total hit with our families devouring the raspberry ripple!
Mike was the mingler, the talker at our wedding. Me? I spent the entire evening on the dance floor and had a ball. I was so tired by the end of the night but knew that enjoying every second was so important. Our immediate family stayed with us in the shepherd’s huts on the farm. It was beautiful waking up to a frosty sun and a view of elongated fields and rolling hills and having your family there. Mark and Jenny provided an amazing breakfast, with coffee and tea, fresh juice, and hampers of bacon rolls, sausage rolls, and croissants in the converted byre. It was so relaxed and wonderful to sit with your nearest and dearest and reflect.
I may have used the words ‘amazing’, ‘lovely’ and ‘wonderful’, but the day was – ultimately – ours. That is what meant the most to us. Our day, with our people.
Your most memorable moments about your wedding day?
There are so many little bits that I think of as ‘flashbacks’. You can have a list of 10:
- 1. I had a cold and felt a bit rotten. All the hairspray was making me cough so much so I took a coffee and breakfast outside and ate it at the entrance of the sheep shed whilst gazing at the fields, feeling so excited. All of a sudden, Dad appeared in his suit and gave me a huge hug. I’ll treasure it forever.
- 2. Dad and I took the tractor to church because… just because I wanted to. Everyone we passed waved, did dances in front of their cars, flashed lights, and cheered. It was great.
- 3. Having the ‘this is it’ moment before the church doors opened and absolutely loving walking down the aisle and seeing Mike’s face.
- 4. The vicar stopping the service to make everyone put a bit of oomph into it. She’s a woman after my own heart.
- 5. Photos on Caldbeck common. I loved every second. It was freezing, it was windy, and dare I say there was even a droplet of rain. Mike was not up for walking through the shrubs and moss, and yet he still did it, just for those shots with the family farm in the background. It’s the best view in the world and will always remind us of our day.
- 6. Seeing people with shirts un-tucked and the school teacher in me telling them to tuck them in!
- 7. Mike’s speech being a belter! There’s a lot of pressure on that moment, isn’t there, and it’s such a diverse audience! What I didn’t expect, though, was Mike’s passion. He’s a great storyteller, joker, and analyst and he crafted his speech to perfection. It was full of laughter, some tears and stories, and overwhelming gratitude for everyone that we both felt.
- 8. Mike’s band played four songs to open the dance floor. Neither of us was fussed about the first dance and so the girls got up on the dance floor and the evening began. They played ‘Making My Dreams Come True’ by Hall and Oates which we often listen to and made me so teary.
- 9. As we sat a the top table, next to our parents, and looked around at all of our friends and family in one place – we both commented on how truly wonderful it was. Mike’s friends came over from Holland, people had traveled so far, and there they were. It was just a shame it was only for that one day.
- 10. We both have so many dance floor flashbacks. Our wedding band, Sneaky Finch, are friends of Mikes and so we knew the music they did was right up our street. Blink 182, Greenday, Foo Fighters, and Feeder to name a few, with a little McFly song Mike had requested as I used to be obsessed. I love watching our wedding video back and reminiscing about certain songs starting and seeing people’s reactions.
What advice would give to other brides when planning their wedding?
So, what did I learn?
Your bridesmaids and ushers are literally your go-to and sort you out all day. They’re wonderful people – why else would you have chosen them – and it brings tears to my eyes knowing that they were part of ‘our team’.
No one will ever know if something doesn’t get done, something goes wrong and there’s nothing wrong with doing things a little bit differently. I was all about pushing against the grain. The more people said ‘you can’t do that’ the more determined I was to do it. Relax, enjoy yourself, and don’t expect everything to happen ‘on time’ – it’ll happen if it happens and if it doesn’t then you probably won’t notice – just enjoy it!
You won’t get around to speaking to everyone – a barbecue or buffet the next day is a lovely idea. We did this at our house.
Not everything has to be expensive. Those pearls? I bought those from Primark at uni. Those shoes? New Look. That cake? Fake! Don’t let cost weigh you down! If you like it, do it!
You won’t see and will forget so much – it was the best thing we did, investing in 2 photographers and a videographer (CPD film) and I’m glad we let other things go in favour of this. Other than choosing to marry one another, this is (without a doubt) the best decision we made.
Prepare the ‘thankyou’s for afterward. I thought I was organised and I know there are people I’ve missed sending ‘thankyou’ messages to (suppliers etc).
Prepare for bereavement. I said I wouldn’t be bothered when the wedding was over and I wasn’t going to be one of those brides who moped. Guess who was that bride! Writing this has been great therapy for reminding myself about the day, the lead-up, and the people involved and less sad it’s all over.
Take the week before the wedding off work. I swear I’d have shifted that cold if I had. Dare I say it, I regret not doing this and that Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday were so busy. It’ll be busy anyway, but it could be so much less frantic and didn’t give me chance to re-boost before the day (which as lovely as it was, was also very long).
We kept our wedding to ourselves for about a year and – honestly – I’m glad. It allowed us to talk and make decisions without other people asking questions. We told people a year before the wedding after we’d booked: the dates, photography, church, and reception venue.
You’ll need help. Thankfully I had my Mum who was on our wavelength and we couldn’t have achieved what we did without her. She had a knack for suggesting but not imposing and knew what I wanted – Mother’s intuition.
You’ll always upset someone. It’s their problem, not yours. Why should you invite Uncle Cyril’s children whom you’ve never met? Or his third wife you don’t like? We didn’t have plus ones for most friends due to cost and numbers but mainly whether we knew the other half or not.
Everyone said the day will go quickly; in fact, we were fed up with hearing it. But now we know why they said it. We were so so sad when it was over. Our photographers and videographer: Camilla, Rebecca, and Pete were part of our day, part of the team, part of the ‘crew’ and if they hadn’t been there to capture the memories we would be left with very little.
Take it one step at a time. Sometimes knowing where to start is the toughest thing. We did it in the following order:
Wedding venue
Church
Photographer
Bride’s dress
Videographer
Florist
Flower girls and Paige boys
Band
Invites
Bridesmaids
Groom and Usher suits
Order of Service
Decorations for the barn
I’d love to hear about your experience at JTBC and your dress journey.
Ahhh, as I write this I smile from ear to ear. Julia Tasker’s Bridal Couture was the second bridal shop I visited and I vividly remember walking in, my Mum and I giving one another the ‘eeeek’ glare, and my goodness, it was heaven.
Initially, it was Julia’s attitude that I loved: what do you like? Let’s try it on. I was free, unconstrained, and encouraged to try and retry dresses. At first, I did wonder if there were enough dresses there – naively not realising that Julia’s boutique allows you to make and build your dress to be exactly what you want, through alterations, jackets, jewellery, veils, belts. This really capitalises on the concept of making a dress individualistic for each bride. I knew elements of what I wanted: long opaque sleeves, simplicity, a classic, timeless piece, but what I did not find easy, at first, was seeing things look lovely on other people and then finding they didn’t suit me. Why? Because we are all made, built, sculpted, and shaped differently. And I didn’t know and wouldn’t have learned this had it not been for Julia. Every session was like therapy!
Her outstanding professionalism and competency allowed me to trust Julia. She was so trustworthy, reliable, and knowledgeable in fact, that we asked her to make Mum’s Mother of the Bride outfit too! And boy – the girl did good!
When it came to deciding between two bridal dresses by English designer Sassi Holford (Autumn with the Heather jacket or Verity) I was so torn and it was then that I really appreciated Julia’s opinion and explanation of what suited me with each dress and why. The competence and confidence were so reassuring – who ever knew there were too many elements to consider: accuracy of shoulders, the width of pleating, length of the jacket – the list goes on.
Ultimately, I walked into this boutique wanting sleeves and I’m so glad I made the choice I did (especially since it was a wet October wedding!) When it came to the night of the reception, I felt like I had two for the price of one as the Heather jacket was whipped off to reveal Autumn beneath. Mike even though I had two separate dresses!
With Julia’s service, we had quite a few fittings – something which I found wonderful. It allowed me to try my dress on, have multiple trial runs with my hair (and believe me – I had many), and try out different pieces of jewellery. We probably had a few more because Julia was making Mum’s dress too – but we doubled up on appointments so they were together. It allowed us to get to know Julia and learn all about her daughter’s adventures in starting university and it felt so special. It’s little things like that that make these trips and the person so memorable and significant and a huge part of your journey.
My Mum and I both whole-heartedly loved every trip we made to Windemere. It gave us a day out together – along with my sister – and was so precious. I feel a sense of bereavement now that it’s over and I don’t have a reason to pop to Windemere as often. Julia taught us so much in terms of dressing and learning about your body, what suits you, what doesn’t and why. I hate cheesiness. In fact, I find it revolting. People said, “Oh Rach, when you know- you’ll know” whilst others muttered, “my dress was nice but I didn’t get ‘that’ feeling”. Well, all I can say is I feel sorry for them. Because when the Heather jacket went on, I just knew and we sobbed – all three of us! That’s right, even Julia shed a tear – and she does this all the time!
I was flooded with relief and gratitude: the dress was amazing, it slimmed me and I didn’t have to slim for it. And that, ladies, is how every bride should feel. Truly terrific!
Suppliers
Dress: Sassi Holford at Julia Tasker Bridal Couture.
Veil: The Couture Veil at Julia Tasker Bridal Couture.
Mother-of-the-Bride dress – bespoke at Julia Tasker Bridal Couture
Photographer: Camilla Lucinda Photography
Venue: St Kentigern’s Church, Caldbeck and Three Hills Barn, Torpenho.
Huge thank you to Rachel and Mike for letting me share a small part of your special day! xx
Until next time,
Julia x
